I just want to write this sad feeling, to liberate it and accept it, that may not my way to get what I want.
How sadly I am! That's really sad! But I am truly believe that is the best decision in this situation. Arrrrggghhhhh, but I must say I missed one worth program due to technical problem. T______T I am a bit worry about the consequences that I will face in the future.
Honestly, I have found myself on difficult to cry about self problems even I really want it. I can cry if there are someone or more who feel sorry or pity about me while some prefer cry alone. Actually, I cry because their sympathy and hugs. If I am alone, I can't cry, it is hard.
The strange thing is I move so easily when I watch sad scene movie, drama, reality show and amazing things surround (stars, sun, moon, beautiful scenery), the touched moment. The tears goin so easily till my nose full of mucus T___T for something not my problem even till I am dizzy. Heheeheehe strange, huh! How about you?
Luckily I have found the good things to cry, write the feeling down and after it 70% of it vanishs.
Everything will be fine! Ahhh, I want to have boyfriend now T_____T for lend me his shoulder or just listen what I want to say.